'You are the reason I live. You are everything to me. I'm sorry for anything I've ever done to hurt you.'

The weight of your secret weighed heavy on my shoulders and I crumpled under the strain. Not only once. More. I was your world and I was collapsing because of it. I'm not strong enough to carry this around, alone.

'I'm in control. I can stop whenever I want.'

Oh yes, I'd heard this one before. Oh yes, I'd heard it from myself. Now look at me.

'If I'm thinner, everything will be better.'

But darling, who decides what defines thinner? I would say that you are thinner. Thinner than me, thinner than her, thinner than most of them. (Them, not us. We are different to them.)

'I prefer to do my own thing. When I go out I just compare myself to everyone around me.'

Does that sound like control to you? Baby, baby, I'm losing you. Come back to me. You're slipping away. Baby, you're too small for even my fingers to keep a hold of. Grains of sand, sliding through my hands. Clock's ticking, I'll keep talking. Maybe you'll listen.

'Can you call the doctors for me soon? I want to sort this out.'

I'd never read a better message. My heart leapt like a tiger, goofy grin spreading across my lips. Yes, yes, yes. You give me hope that someone might actually listen to me. You give me hope for my future, and yours. You give me hope.

It's just the beginning. You're scared and so am I.
But I'm a constant. In your life, I'm never changing. Always by your side and always willing. And that is my promise to you.